Why Even the Best Performers Need a Coach

What do Serena Williams, the 2004 U.S. Women’s Soccer Team, and the 2024 U.S. Women’s Gymnastics Team have in common?

They all had coaches.

Not because they lacked talent.
Not because they weren’t disciplined.

But because high performers know something the rest of us sometimes forget:

You can’t always see what’s holding you back when you’re standing inside the problem.

That was the conversation we had recently on the Her Money Story podcast, where my co-host Mandi Hering and I sat down with money coach Kim Trihn to talk about the real power of coaching.

And the conversation quickly moved beyond sports.

Because coaching doesn’t just apply to athletes.

It shows up in our careers, our health, our relationships, and especially our relationship with money.

Coaching Isn’t About Weakness

One of the first misconceptions we addressed was the idea that needing a coach somehow means you can’t do something on your own.

Kim put it into perspective quickly.

“If you're interested in performance, then you want to be interested in having a coach.” — Kim Trihn

Think about it.

Michael Phelps didn’t win 23 Olympic gold medals by figuring everything out himself. Elite athletes have coaches for:

• nutrition

• technique

• mindset

• recovery

• strategy

The best performers in the world surround themselves with people who can see what they can’t see.

And yet in everyday life—especially when it comes to money—many of us believe we should just figure it out ourselves.

The Difference Between a Coach and a Cheerleader

Mandi brought up something that many people secretly feel when they start working with a coach.

Sometimes… we don’t actually want a coach.

We want a cheerleader.

Someone to tell us we're doing great.

Someone who agrees with us.

But a coach’s job is different.

A good coach sometimes pushes you to do things that feel uncomfortable. Maybe even things you don’t want to do.

Because real progress often lives just outside your comfort zone.

And that’s often where something else shows up: the ways we protect ourselves.

Over time, most of us develop what you might call a kind of emotional armor around certain parts of our lives — including money.

It’s not something we do intentionally. It’s simply how we protect ourselves from feeling uncertain, judged, or wrong.

But that same armor can make it harder to hear the feedback that helps us grow.

Kim described coaching in a way I loved.

Sometimes coaching looks like encouragement.

Other times it looks like what she calls “ruthless compassion.”

That means caring deeply about someone’s success while still being willing to say the hard thing.

And if we’re honest, those are often the moments when the biggest growth happens.

Why Goals Matter More Than We Think

One thing that came up in the conversation is that coaching doesn’t really work without clarity.

You have to know what you're aiming for.

Not just a vague idea like:

“I want to do better with money.”

But something more specific.

Maybe it's:

• Paying off debt

• Building long-term wealth

• Retiring earlier

• Creating financial freedom for your family

Kim often talks about helping clients identify their North Star.

That’s the bigger vision guiding all the smaller decisions.

Because when you know where you're going, a coach can help keep you aligned when life inevitably knocks you off course.

And that happens more often than we think.

In fact, pilots flying from Los Angeles to New York are technically off course most of the time.

They constantly adjust.

That’s what coaching does.

It helps you keep adjusting until you reach the destination.

Why Change Is So Hard

There was one moment in the conversation that really stuck with me.

Kim shared a quote that perfectly captures why people struggle to change habits—especially with money.

“You will remain the same until the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of the change.” — Kim Trihn

That line hits home for a lot of people.

Because changing behavior isn’t just about information.

Most people already know the basics of good financial habits:

Spend less than you earn.
Save consistently.
Invest for the future.

The challenge isn’t knowledge.

It’s behavior — and the quiet ways we protect ourselves from change.

When something feels uncomfortable, our first instinct is often to defend the way we’ve been doing things.

Sometimes that shows up as explaining why something won’t work.

Sometimes it shows up as avoiding the conversation altogether.

Those reactions are completely human. They’re part of the emotional armor we build over time.

A good coach helps you notice when that armor is showing up — not to criticize it, but to help you move past it.

Coaches See What You Can’t See

One of the things I’ve personally experienced from working with coaches is something simple but powerful.

They see things you don’t.

When you're inside your own situation, it's easy to follow the same patterns over and over again.

The same decisions.
The same habits.
The same thinking.

And sometimes those patterns are exactly what’s keeping you stuck.

Often those patterns developed for a reason.

Maybe they protected you at some point.

Maybe they helped you navigate uncertainty or avoid difficult financial experiences in the past.

But over time, the same instincts that once protected us can quietly limit what’s possible.

That’s another place where a coach can be invaluable.

They can see when the armor we built years ago is still shaping the decisions we’re making today.

As I shared during the conversation:

“You’ve only seen your own life. A coach has seen dozens of other people navigate the same challenges.” — Felicia Gopaul

And sometimes that outside perspective is exactly what unlocks progress.

Coaching Is a Partnership

Another important point that came up during the conversation is that coaching isn’t something that happens to you.

It’s something you participate in.

You have to be willing to be coached.

That means being open to:

• feedback

• new strategies

• uncomfortable conversations

• trying things differently

Not every coaching relationship works—and often it comes down to whether someone is truly ready for change.

Because the truth is, sometimes we say we want change… but we still want to do things the same way.

Real transformation requires something different.

Investing in Yourself

One of the most powerful shifts people make is realizing that hiring a coach is really an investment in themselves.

Whether it’s a health coach, business coach, or financial coach, what you’re really investing in is:

• clarity

• accountability

• faster progress

• and better results

Many people spend years trying to solve problems alone.

A coach can often help you navigate those same challenges in a fraction of the time.

The Bigger Picture

One of the things I love about conversations like this is that they remind us that success is rarely a solo journey.

Behind every great athlete, leader, entrepreneur, or investor is usually someone helping them think bigger, stay accountable, and keep moving forward.

Coaching isn’t about weakness.

It’s about commitment.

Commitment to growth.
Commitment to better results.
Commitment to becoming the person capable of achieving the goals you’ve set.

And sometimes the smartest thing you can do is simply decide:

You don’t have to do it alone.

If this idea resonates with you — especially the moments when you realize you might be standing inside your own blind spots — it may be worth exploring what a coaching conversation could look like.

Sometimes the most powerful shift isn’t learning something new.

It’s having someone help you see what you couldn’t see on your own.